Album Reflections – ZAYN's "Nobody Is Listening" begs the question ‘when will you come home?’

Video Courtesy of Zayn Malik via YouTube

We sat down to experience ZAYN’s Nobody is Listening. And the result is nothing but raw, honest bear-your-whole-soul-but-be-shy-about-it brilliance. This isn’t a space nor album for the weak-hearted.

Image courtesy of Clash Music

it’s a scary thought to be unheard

Although ZAYN has held a special place in my heart since I was a doe-eyed 14 year old girl watching Britain’s Got Talent, I’ve fallen off-track terribly when it comes to keeping up with his musical ventures in the last few years. So, it was natural that I hadn’t gotten to his album until a little over 4 months post its release. The curiousness of finding ZAYN live on Instagram at 3am one day with a new soundtrack in the background was enough to reignite my curiosity and convince me to commit to checking it out. It was snowing for the first time in 2021 when I decided to spend a few hours experiencing it in its entirety, on repeat. The combination of the accumulating softness outside and ZAYN’s sweet words were such a sweet, hidden delight. Yes. It really is that sweet.

Being a middle kid and a bit of an odd one, self-deprecation is the kind of humour I know a little too well; not as a way of putting myself down, but rather, as a channel that makes me feel completely liberated – all pretence of formality is dropped. I’m away from social pressures of having to prove my intelligence and existence to anyone and everyone I come across, to merge with infinite love and just be – whether it appears to be a watered-down version or excessively gratuitous version of myself. It’s all One.

So, the somewhat daunting album title “Nobody is Listening” resonated well with me – like a promise to cut out the external chaos and get comfortable with the unknown that lies within.  It’s a scary thought, to be unheard. And the privilege of holding space for myself is one I’m learning to appreciate.

By the end of the album, however, I was reminded how soul-soothingly enough it is to hold clarity within. To make space for internal dialogue that is authentic enough to listen to myself – from my deepest desires, to understanding the emotions behind so many different relationship dynamics, to sounds that remind me of snowy, beautiful, easy days.

And so, ignited by the mood of this album, I wondered… when’s the last time I listened to myself? Or reflected on my own perceptions of my life thus far? By the time I was 3 tracks in, the experience of this soundtrack reignited my appreciation for the richness of inner dialogue, and sparked much needed questions I needed to ask myself. Like stuff about my own authenticity in experiencing my thoughts and emotions about my inner and outer worlds. This definitely wasn’t a trip for the weakhearted. Not following? Read along to learn more.

Video Courtesy of Zayn Malik via YouTube

we are who we are when we’re alone

As an overarching theme, common threads between all of ZAYN’s albums post One Direction include nostalgia and introspection at the forefront –  a potentially deadly combo that sends even the most seasoned individuals under a path toward self-sabotage if not done right. Yet, it seems ZAYN’s got it figured out, irrespective of what his relationship with self-sabotage may be as he hums his tunes. Behind all this lays ZAYN’s honest, raw channeling of his own EQ. ZAYN’s not afraid of showing his vulnerabilities or documenting the innermost thoughts experiences he feels and ruminates on. I wonder why we don’t do this with each other enough. And, if there’s shame involved in the answer to this…. why the fuck are we so ashamed of what we feel?

ZAYN’s seemingly high EQ is something I’ve noticed and grown to admire in his lyricism any time I’ve heard his newest hits playing on the radio since I was a young girl. The earnestly unfiltered lyrics of many of his ballads in this album, the latest fragrance from this flower coming from the ballad Better, strike a chord of sheer appreciation for simple emotions. What a joy it is to experience and reminisce on them, regardless of what we may be experiencing right now. Check out River Road and Better, combined and deconstructed, they remind me of the earnestness, hushed resolute, and emotional honesty of iT’s YoU in a lot of ways.

And so, with Calamity, and Windowsill in the background I ruminate on how violent emotions can be hushed within us. When we will stop silencing ourselves and each other as we refuse to understand them?

“Nobody is Listening” holds tempos and beats that aren’t foreign to ZAYN, The album consists of tunes and melodies – fast and slow – that are all too delineative of my own musical taste growing up. A cross between the undertones of One Direction’s signature pop sound, 90s hip hop inspired beats, ZAYN’s usual crooning that puts my puppy to sleep, and electro-R&B sounds heard in his debut album, Mind of Mine and in parts of Icarus Falls. Each track is a different experience, drawing in inspiration from different genres to create eclectic sounds that are now part of his signature soundtracks. They are dichotomous in a lot of ways: edgy but soft, pop but alternative. A reminder that the in-between is safe, even as we experiment, and not opting to choose between either is perfectly fine sometimes.

Image Courtesy of The Silly TV

i know i’m always in my head,

damn, i thought that we would make it

I never thought that feeling deeply was a wonderful thing. Combined with all of the mental noise and relentless rationalization of what I feel, until recently, it’s never been a fun time internally.  The bluesy pieces ZAYN outputs feel like they agree.

The story in Outside is one that is quite relatable. Just like many of the break up songs we’ve all grown to love – regardless of which languages they may be written and expressed in – play out to be tough and worthy containers for our experiences until the song ends, leaving us to deflect again. In the case of Outside, the imagery of being left out isn’t something I’m foreign to. I’m sure you’re familiar with it, too. How often do we leave ourselves outside of our own hurting? Or, our fellow human beings out of feel-good experiences?

And yet, leaving my life outside is one I find joy in. To ruminate over the blessings of what and who used to be behind the door – with aspirations, dreams and future goals honouring the silent blessings of who was the One. Who will be the One. Physical presence or not, it all lasts. It’s not abandonment to walk away from oneself and return home. This is part of your hero’s journey. It’s how you learn to love the newfound emptiness behind the door. Liberation. Melancholy, but free. I am my own hero, always. I hope you are, too.

Video Courtesy of Zayn Malik via YouTube

connexion

This album, in its entirety then, begs the question of why we are so afraid of intense emotional connexion. Why do we work against our pain and suffering to miss out on another love? Another human connection? Another opportunity to string hearts together. Is our relationship with what hurts us real bliss? Or is there fear behind building something significantly honest and resilient with each other?

The sheer revolution that comes from sitting in one’s own sadness of letting go while holding onto the beauty of how once back when felt is something I’m learning to let speak to me. I’m learning to be quiet and not let false mental intelligence get in the way. As ZAYN explores the facets of it in this tracklist, I am always reminded that nobody is listening. There is no room for that here. ZAYN’s earnestness in this sense, no matter how smooth and transparent the lyrics may be, invokes such stillness and allows space for meaningful internal dialogue. Looking back, I’ve never really been able to vocalize the pain of losing someone I love. Or letting go. Or walked myself through experiences with so much love for myself and the world, even if they may be painful ones. ZAYN’s introspection and bear-it-all emotional depiction in pitch and tone are a reminder of how uncomplicated being with myself to unpack all of this really can be.

And so I ask you, when’s the last time you left yourself outside?

When will you come home?

INTERMISSION: fLoWeR is a part of Zayn Malik’s first independent album, ZAYN (2018).

Video Courtesy of Zayn Malik via YouTube

always for the culture

I’m always about an artist representing their culture instead of following a phenomenon of “white people dreams,” which often, coloured people are pressured against by our micro communities. For me, Zayn undoubtedly is representing a whole hub of people across South Asia as he beautifully mixes his Pakistani origins with his British upbringing. This is something I have noticed and jumped quickly to appreciate – where, a lot of my favourite South Asians in mainstream music circuits look like me, but refuse to sound like me. Tightrope induces nostalgia that gets me thinking – as well as wondering why externally from me, nobody’s listening. I’m thinking of ZAYN’S half-Pakistani heritage, and how the influence Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan prompted the creation of Intermission: Flower, to, now, the quiet, 21st century version of Mohd. Rafi’s classic, Chaudvin Ka Chand Ho. I think of the cultural hotbed diasporic South Asians hold so much regard for – a foreign place to us in a lot of ways, but tightly wound in our DNA. An imaginary connector that we can’t see, and don’t realize how much we long for. Yet, we exist in a liminal space. Belonging to neither region and constantly ostracizing ourselves and each other for it.

And then, I think of all of the remixes that come out of Bollywood – often turning such thoughtful classics into unrepeatable versions of legendary tracks, reducing the quality, meaning, and quite literally, all else involved that makes a track so great. I wonder why such music has so many views, when melodies like Tightrope are deserving of the spotlight. These are the real culture-making experiences that we can claim, but also close our eyes and feel those who came before us close by.

ZAYN’s recent music is not a bridge we can see, but it is one we can hear. A valuable gift and documentation of our existence in this in between place.

This album, then, for me is an ode to the diaspora kids. We grow up with a lot of unanswered questions, yet, we also long for a culture and people that are so brilliant at dividing us. We can say ZAYN’s music is often repetitive with the beats, subject matter, and tempos he utilizes – which are subjects that link reviews I’ve read of ZAYN’s previous two albums – but, the unabashed connection he has to his heritage that he holds proudly, regardless if its created by meaningless lines that label us as Pakistani or Indian, or anything else, connects us to the generations of our parents and grandparents. In this case, the familiar tempos create an emotional channel to merge us with the cultures and sounds that shaped us, while also bringing a unique, fresh take to all that we hold dear from them. For this, I’m grateful, and I can’t wait to hear what other part of my childhood is connected with the world around me today in ZAYN’s next beats.

Image Courtesy of Man For Himself

Jagreet’s favourite tunes

Outside, Tightrope, Vibez, Better

Close seconds

Sweat, Unfuckwitable, Windowsill, Calamity

Album rating: 4/5

ZAYN will take you to a far away place where music draws raw, buried emotions within you to the surface to be uncovered, examined and felt to their full potential. Here, it may feel cold at first, but if you let go, I promise, it will always be snowy, dreamy heaven.

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